Find the Balance

March 27 2024

Notes by Aarya Mishra

Review

A mouse smelled sweet corn in a basket. It made a hole in it, went in, and gorged on the corn. But when he finished, he discovered he couldn’t go out, since he had eaten so much, his belly expanded. The mouse started to cry aloud. A rabbit passing by heard it. It said that the mouse should sleep it off, and its belly will shrink. The mouse agreed, and slept. It wakes up to sweet corn, all around. It eats more and more. Once again, it cannot leave. But it decides it will just sleep it off again. While it’s sleeping, a cat comes, pops the lid, and eats the mouse.

We learnt about unending wants, and how not doing what you feel like doing is true freedom. There were 3 things that we learnt. The first, eating. If we only ate what we wanted, our bodies would be very unhealthy. You can’t just eat candy and ice cream!

The second is hygiene. The practices that we use to keep our bodies healthy are needed, like showering, laundry, denral care, and others. If we didn’t do these things, we would become sick. 

The third is our priorities. Many people say, I don’t want to _____, or I don’t like to _____. If we only focus on what we want, all of our learning, growth, developmentall of growth development would be compromised. Balance is always needed between wants and needs.

The RAW from last week was that when you want something like a new game, or another pair of shoes, ask yourself,  is this something I want or need?

Story

A taxi driver in a large city arrived at his final stop, and honked. Waiting a few minutes, he honked again. Most people would just pull away, it was their last stop. Instead, he put the car in park and walked up to the door, knocked, and waited. He heard elderly voice saying, ‘Just a minute, just a minute.’  A tiny lady, maybe in her 90s or 100s, came out with the sweetest smile on her face. She was wearing a pretty ironed dress, and a hat. As she answered the door, he caught a glimpse of the house. It looked like no one had lived there in years. The couches were covered, the walls were bare. She asked him to carry her bag, and he did, helping her into the car, put the bag in the trunk, and she handed him the piece of paper, saying this was the address she needed to go to, and asked him to drive downtown. He told her that it was not the fastest way. She said that she was not in a hurry, and she was going to hospice. She can see concern on his face. She says that she has no family left, and not much time left. The driver shuts the meter off and takes her downtown. 

They drive to the city, laughing and talking, and she shows him everything related to her life, her work, her school, ect. Passing by a few parks, she asks him to slow down and she would just look outside without a word. After a few hours, she said tha she was tired, let us go to the hospice. As they reached, two people came to help her out of the cab and into a wheelchair. The driver took out her bag and the woman asked, “How much do I owe you?” . He said, “Nothing.” She protested, but he refused to take anything. Finally, she said “You’ve made an old lady very happy.” They parted ways. He got in the car, and drove away. He didn’t say anything else for the rest of the day. He wondered as he drove home, what if she had gotten someone who was impatient and didn’t do anything, like taking the slow route, driving for hours, even waiting for her at the door instead of driving away. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he had witnessed was the most important moment in his and her life.

Lesson

In the story, the driver embodied patience. He didn’t just honk for the old lady, went to the door, knocked, and waited. He turned the meter off, and drove around with her for hours. Everyone prefers to be around people who are happy and kind.

We can learn two things from this story.

1. We are stronger, more confident, even happier, when we are honest, happy, calm, and loving. Since we all want to be around people like this, we want to associate with virtuous people, because thouse virtues are what make us feel good. Sometimes we can struggle to live up to them, so we associate with people living up to them so we can too. We need to embrace what is natural and value virtues. 

2. Every experience in our lives is an opportunity to learn, grow, or develop. When we are bored, we’ve forgotten that there is something to learn. We stopped being curious. The world and everything in it is always trying to teach us, we need to learn to tune into it. Always be curious. 

Activity

First Friend Dwija asked us to reflect on a series of questions.

Think about your all time favorite memory. What did you feel like? What emotions? Probably good ones, like happiness, excitement, ect. Do you always want to have happy memories? Of course you do! Do you want your family to remember you as happy, kind, and joyful? Probably. If we release positive emotions, we get these back. If we release negative emotions, we get these back.

RAW

Anytime you are feeling overwhelmed, whether you are sad, frustrated, angry, or even excited, notice that, step back, and take 5 deep breaths.

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Notes By Om Shreejay

Review: 

Last week we heard the story of a mouse that wanted to eat sweet corn in a basket. He dug a hole into the basket but after eating he couldn’t fit through to come out and so decides to sleep it out. A rabbit reminds him that he can just sleep off the corn. The next morning, he eats more corn and couldn’t fit through again. Later a cat wanders by and eats the sleeping mouse. 

The story shows us the mouse’s unending wants and that not to do what you feel like doing is true freedom. We explored this in 3 ways – 1/Diet: If we only ate what we wanted and not what we needed, we would become unhealthy. Balance is needed between our desires and what is required, 2/Hygiene: Practices that keep our body healthy e.g., showering, brushing our teeth, wearing clean clothes, 3/Responsibilities/priorities: Our growth is compromised if we focus only on our wants. Balance is needed between our wants (what we feel like doing) and our needs (what we must do). 

Our RAW was – when you want something, ask yourself – Is this something I want or need? If it is a want, sleep on it.  

Story:

A taxi driver arrived at his last stop to pick someone up and when his ride didn’t show up, he went up to the door and knocked. A short old woman in her nineties answered the door and gave him the destination address with a request to drive through downtown, which was not the shortest way to the destination. She said she was not in a hurry and was on her way to the hospice. As they made eye contact she could see the concern in his face. She said her doctor told her that she didn’t have much time left and she had no family left. The driver shut off his meter and asked her what route she would like him to take. 

For the next few hours as he drove, they chatted and laughed as she pointed out where she lived, grew up, went to school, work, etc. She sometimes asked him to slow down and stop as she looked out into the darkness and say nothing. Finally, as they reached the destination, she asked the driver how much she owed her. He replied that he would not charge her for the ride. He leaned over and gave the old woman a big hug. As he did, she held on to him and thanked him for making her happy. He didn’t pick up any other passengers that night and didn’t say a word. 

He thought about what could have happened that evening – what if the woman got an impatient or angry driver, what if he didn’t make the decision to walk up to her door when she did not show up for the ride, what if her driver had refused to take her around town? He couldn’t shake the feeling that this single moment could be one of the most important moments of his life and her life. 

Lesson from Story

When one is calm, kind, patient, learning or anything we do is more fun. The taxi driver in this story embodied patience. 

1/We feel stronger, confident, happier when we embody virtues – when we are honest, patient, kind, calm. Virtues are what make us feel good and help us. Embrace what is natural. Value virtues. Associate with the virtuous.

2/Every experience in our lives is an opportunity to learn, grow, and develop. The world is always trying to teach us. Tune in, pay attention, and always be curious. 

Activity:

First Friend Dwija asked us to think about our all-time favorite memory. How did you feel during this special moment? Do you want to have these happy memories forever? Do you want to be remembered as a happy person who brings others joy?

If we are happy, we spread happiness around us. 

RAW:

Anytime you are feeling overwhelmed (sad/frustrated/angry/excited), tune into it and step back – take 5 deep breaths. 

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